The coronavirus does suck but we can use this time in many meaningful ways, including how to thrive and not just survive.
As we go through this today, I want to talk about how do you know when you should quit on something. I want you to think about one thing, a decision you’ve been sitting on of quitting on a relationship, on a job, on friendship, on anything, or eveb a bad habit.
So now that you have that, to write it down.
Let’s talk about my experience. One of the hardest things for me to quit was knowing when I should quit on a serious relationship. I fell in love with this beautiful girl. She is intelligent, hardworking, loyal, just amazing and so many other incredible things about her. We fell in love.
We started dancing and she was the first girl I moved in with. She was the first girl I proposed to. About a year before we were supposed to get married, I felt like we shouldn’t be together. But I’m not a quitter, it’s part of my identity.
I proposed in front of her family and my family. There was a lot of weight there. I’m not a quitter. We had so much money down in non-refundable cakes and all that stuff. We built our whole life around each other. All her friends, my friends, community, everybody knew us as these two people, one person. Invitations flying out around the world. I’M NOT A QUITTER
Two months before our wedding date, we were sitting on our bed. We tried so many beautiful things, so much work, and so many adjustments. I look at her, I’m like, “this isn’t going to work right?” She’s like, “yeah I know”.
I asked her, “when did you know?” She said, “about a year ago”. I asked her, “how come you didn’t tell me?” She said “I’m not a quitter.”
So here’s the thing, I think we need to quit on many important things and we wait too long. why did we wait? Why did we wait when we already knew. Why do we have to work so hard to make sure?
I realized that a lot of our doubts come from, what we are afraid to lose.
“I put the time in, I put love in. I can’t give up all it all up. I put too much in. The thing is…its all just sunk cost. You’re never getting that time back. That time has gone, the love has gone and we get so stuck in the past. Whether it’s in a job, in a position, I’m senior in this and I put all this time and I can’t lose this.”
Instead of looking at the past why not look at your future and think “I’ve got another 10, 15, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, 70 years years ahead of me” “Where do I want to invest my happiness.”
The biggest regret we will have is the gap between when we feel we should act on something and we wait. That’s the gap of unhappiness. That’s the gap of regret.
When we’re 80 or 90 years old, we’re lying on our death. The thing most people say is: “I wish I was just more brave earlier. I wish I asked that girl out. I wish I did this, but I didn’t act.” It’s the hesitation.
Here’s the amazing silver lining, with the Coronavirus we do have way more time on our hands. Whether you’re a parent, single or whatever, we do have more time. And all those excuses why we can’t start looking for a different job or start thinking about how to end that relationship. We have the time now so we can use this time to make the hard decisions. Then when we come out, we feel like we’ve thrived and not just survived.
I’m a wholehearted believer that big decisions go with your heart. That’s the thing that will lead you correctly. Because look at all the major regrets in your life. The real major ones out of 10 of them, no more than two were, “Man, I was impulsive. I shouldn’t have done this.” Most of your regrets would have been, I should have done it sooner. I wish I just listened to my heart and acted on it.
So whatever you’re sitting on, you already know you don’t need to go for more advice. Start taking baby steps if you have to. Start moving to the happiness and the life you deserve so you’re not just surviving, you’re thriving!
If you want me to answer another question or you want me to give you advice on something you’re struggling with, please leave it in the comments below. I love you guys.
