HOW TO DANCE WITH A PARTNER
Everyone wants to know how to dance with a partner. Leaders and followers want to vibe and connect and flow across the dance floor. It doesn’t matter if you are dancing Salsa, Bachata or any other style of dance these tips will help you feel like you #belong on the dance floor.
Moves Don’t Matter, Energy Matters
When I first started dancing, I was self conscious and insecure. I was worried about messing up my moves, that my partner would not be happy dancing with me. I was so concerned that I created a cloud of negative energy. Of course I messed up moves – I still do. But after dancing over 10000+ songs over the last 13+ years I have learned that all dance partners appreciate a positive energy more than any fancy trick. So, be kind to yourself. That harsh, critical voice inside your head is just that – inside your head. It ruins the experience for both you and your partner. Remind yourself that you are there to have fun. People notice our energy before they notice our skills. If you have a positive mental attitude, you and your partner will have a lot more fun.
Great Leaders Serve Their Partners
I thought a great leader had to impress their partner. I wanted my followers to think I was a great dancer and if I impressed them, they would leave the dance floor smiling. The result was that I tried to do moves that were too advanced for me and/or my partner. So instead of leaving with smiles, my partners often left the dance floor frustrated and anxious because they felt they couldn’t keep up. A great leader doesn’t care about themselves but focuses on serving the people that follow. Apply that to your dancing. Your job as a leader to is LEAD. Not to bully your follower into moves. Once that switched in my head, I started to find more people wanted to dance with me. I found more followers left with a smile…even if all we did was basics and single turns.
Great Followers are Great Listeners
Have you ever been with a friend and all they do is talk about themselves? No matter what you have to say or how important it is, they just keep bringing it back to them? Or they constantly interrupt you because they assume they know what you are going to say? A great follower, like a great friend, listens and doesn’t predict what’s coming. They stay in the moment. The best dances I have are always with partners (beginners, intermediate, level never matters) that are PRESENT with me. They are focused on the dance and not distracted, not rushing when I led something and not looking around the dance floor for their next partner. They made me feel safe. I felt they trusted me. Connection can’t happen if you have two leaders battling for attention.
So with positive energy, leaders serving their partners and followers listening, a true partnership happens and the smoothness, connection, energy and flow that develops is always beautiful.
Learn how dancing can strengthen a romantic relationship by reading Fun Couples Ideas.
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